Driving less offensively

Have you ever been in a hurry and drove like a maniac? I have. I have also yelled at people in traffic and even one time actually got out of the car during an ice storm to confront someone who was tailing me too closely and actually pulled up on me and threatened me. I take great offense to that type of behavior by other motorist especially when my children are in the car. (Thankfully he got back in his truck and the situation didn't go any further.) Another situation that sticks out in my mind was a night years ago when we were doing normal things a family does. My wife and I were talking and sitting in the living room while our son played on the floor with his Ben 10 action figures when suddenly in his mind at least fantasy became a reality. “DAD!” he yelled, “I’m turning into an alien!” My wife and I examined his hands and in fact they were swollen. He then complained of ankle pain and sure enough his ankles were swollen. We immediately sprang into action as any parent would and in 2.3 seconds we were in the car and on our way to the emergency room. We traveled down West Housatonic St., onto South Merriam St. Now I would never ordinarily do this if say I was on my way to pick up a pizza or late to meet a client but under the circumstances the car in front of me was going too slow (they were doing the speed limit.) if you've ever driven down this street you know you can see clearly all the way to West St. but there are no passing lanes. I made the decision to pass. The driver of the car sped up and flashed his/her high beams on me. I didn't give it a second thought until later as I was long gone and to the hospital in record time.

It’s situations like this and all the recent headlines of motor vehicle accidents and pedestrian deaths resulting in either a failure on the part of the individual to take care when crossing the street or by drivers either under the influence or possibly on their cell phone that has prompted me to write this letter. Personally I yield to pedestrians when driving there are times however when I can’t because they just leap out into the road without even looking. I watched a lady when I was coming off Broad St. just walk into the road in front of me luckily for her one of us was paying attention.  As I have gotten “older” I have just come to the conclusion that it’s just not worth driving fast and if people want to drive like maniacs then I just move over and let them go. We have to realize that when we drive like this we are a danger not only to ourselves but to other people on the road a lot of them children being transported by either their parents or other adults responsible for getting them to their destination safely.

Here’s what I propose. Let’s all start thinking about other people and showing concern for their safety and understanding for unique circumstances like the one I shared when starting this.  We never know what is going on when we see someone speeding by. (A sick child or close family member in need perhaps.) I have found that not only has my driving experience changed for the better but my role as a pedestrian has gotten less stressful as well.

This is what I do and what I teach my own children. When you want to cross the street and there is no light you stand on the curb and wait for the drivers to see you, come to a complete stop and make eye contact. Then wave and give a thank you! (Be careful in double lanes because people have been known to speed around, you know those people who don’t have a second to spare!) I have also been using this philosophy if you will on the road as well. If someone is turning I slow down. I don’t block side streets at red lights and I’m courteous in lane merges. I don’t speed and I don’t engage with ignorant self-centered individuals who drive with a sense of entitlement for positions in traffic.

Why are we as a society so unwilling to be courteous and caring to people on the road and crossing the street? I’m not suggesting everyone is like this but it’s those clashes and attitudes of self-centeredness and entitlement that I believe contributes to senseless accidents and avoidable injury and sometimes death. The main message that I want to get out, what I am asking of you is to just be nice to each other. A little bit of kindness goes a long way! Try it and you will see that your life does get less stressful!